I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
PANTIES FOUND
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