ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
