I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
