I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
