There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize