Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
