bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
