His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
