Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize