But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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