So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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