i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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