Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize
