Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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