last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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