The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
