I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Randomize
