so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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