I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Randomize
