is your mom at the bar?
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
