idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
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