hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
