I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
