At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
