Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Randomize
