is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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