if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
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