i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
im holly from the hills drunk
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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