I am in a vortex of obligation.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
