He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
