oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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