Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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