the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
