i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
