how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
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