butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
This is the high leading the old right now
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
