I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
accomplished twins. life is a go
It's just like the Real World with babies
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
