jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
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