Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Randomize
