u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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