and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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