Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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