just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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