Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Randomize
