just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
