me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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