Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Girls should come with a carfax report
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
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