could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
