so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
