Old men and throwing up are my life now.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize