Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
